Sit down, we need to talk.

Hello,

If you are reading this, than I thank you for being so loyal. For the last fortnight or so I've been in a most foul temper. So, alliteratively, to adhere to the ancient adage of it being better to say nothing at all, than to say things of an unpleasant nature, I have endured a monk like silence and have finally come to a point where I feel I'm able to once again greet the world with arms wide open. (Previous statement in no way encourages or endorses Scott Stapp)

That being said I have constructed a cavalcade of words, phrases, soliloquies, and otherwise which shall combine in a confluence that will enlighten your mind to the real world in which I live. There will be ups-and-downs, ins-and-outs and even some around-and-throughs, but most importantly all will be laid out in a pattern of harmonics designed to maximize emotional, and physical satiation. Now is the time to put the kids to bed, grab a drink and maybe some tissues, and prepare your palate for the feast of words en route to a magnificent collision with your brain. Prepare your synapses, this could get bumpy.

When last we parted ways Daddy had never spent a night in Chattanooga, Tennessee, Mommy was ignorant to the plot line of Pan's Labyrinth and I was susceptible to more diseases than I would like to speak of. All this and more has been rectified. Daddy spent three days away in Tennessee for work while Mommy and I visited Grandma and Grandpa Butts (hehe). It was a good time, I saw my Great Grandparents, met a very licky dog, and slept in places I'd never slept in before. I liked it. Shortly after the three of us reunited again at home we left for Grandma and Grandpa Johnson's house. We spent Memorial weekend with my aunts, cousin and of course the G-P's (that's street for grandparents). While away Courtney almost turned 22, we pretended she did for convenience-sake, I picked out a gnome rain gauge for her to play with. On the eve of the faux party I was babysat whilst mother and father gallivanted around the town like unfettered, meddlesome youth. I was going to be bratty to teach them a lesson about their obligation to me, but the G-P's were just too nice to use for such a scandalous purpose.

Memorial Day was celebrated with sleeping in, bubble bread and a distinct absence of Daddy in the morning. He returned nigh the end of lunch and was a little wound up and hard of hearing. Who knows what mischief found him and Mr. Habluetzel that fateful morn in the Habluetzel's basement for over 3 hours. Later that day Daddy changed the oil in the car and rotated the tires. I would have helped him but I was busy with the aunts looking at large toilets and being paraded in front of past co-workers. All in all fun was had.

The work week started again and was as blase as usual. There were highlights worth noting, though and I shall do so ere long. Through the courtesy of Netflix Ma and Pa watched two excellent movies this week. The first was the choice of Dad, Pan's Labyrinth it was and was little known to the duo prior to the watching. The movie was in Spanish and I can't read so I didn't have a clue what was going on. The parents sure seemed to like it though. I hear it was quite imaginative and well done. The second movie of the week was Citizen Kane. Made in 1941 and oft heralded as one of the greatest movies of all time Mom and Dad were a little leary of what they had relegated themselves to for 119 minutes of Thursday evening. Again I had trouble following it but it seems Mr. Orson Welles did well for himself as he co-wrote, directed, produced and starred in a movie that was enjoyed by all in the room. In a slight but none too severe digression I would like to relate another happening of this week. Daddy finally spent a gift card he had to RadioShack. He bought some nice speaker wire and a fiber optics patch cable. The speaker wire he used to set up a simple little surround sound system to enhance the movie watching experience. The fiber optics cable he used to connect his CD player to his A/V receiver. Now it may simply be the bias of the people who spent $25 (hence the gift card) on a four foot cable but the sound has noticably improved. Likely the reason is due to either the lack of magnetic interference from the other nearby wires and high current devices or that the Harmon Kardon receiver has a better system of digital to analog converters which produces a cleaner sound, or a combination of the two. Be it bias or science the investment was deemed good, if any doubt remains in you then stop on by and judge for yourself.

Come now with me to the first of June; a day I shall rue for the duration of my memory of it. It started off normally but instead of Daddy leaving for work Momma and I drove him there and left him. The reason for this became evident as Momma and I later hopped in the car and drove to a place where I'd never been before, although there was a vague familiarity to it. It was all going well, I had a nice new lady friend dressed in a funny white uniform to talk to and a very sterile environment in which to talk; what more could a girl ask for?? Well I asked for no more but got it anyways. This assumingly nice lady started pricking me with sharply honed rods of metal. Worst of all my dear Mother not only let her but aided and abetted her. Apparently the experience was good for me. Immunizations are necessary they say. Well did they ever have them, huh? Seeing as how they're not dead perhaps they have. Whatever I hope I don't have to do that again. I'm sure one round takes care of everything that ever may ail me. Right? Regardless I've been a little touchy since then, I sleep more too. As a matter of fact just last night I was awaken from a perfectly nice nine hour sleep just to eat. I quickly resumed my slumbering post and have kept it as often as allowed today. FYI, I'm large, I now weight 15lb 2oz and am 24.75 inches long, with a Butts family head 16.25 inches around.

Well my time is drawing to an end here. If you have endured to this point perhaps you'll endulge me a moment longer. I trust this has been as entertaining and informative for you as it has been therapeutic for me. It would be a lie to say I won't miss you. The bond I feel to you all is best expressed through a poem, probably, I don't really read a lot of poetry, but I've heard some of it's pretty good.

Again I say goodnight,

Addilyn Elise

P.S. If there was a lack of emotional connection in this or any other posts remember, I dictate to my father.